Saturday, June 9, 2012

Keep the Faith


After being straight for 29 years now, I look back and

wonder how I was ever gay. Two kids, a wife, all the

great trappings of suburban life and unlike some

peopel claim, I don't wonder what I missed. I don't

think about going to a gay bar or sex with a man. I

think about other stuff, getting leaves out of the

gutter without falling off the roof, getting enough

money to pay for my youngest son's college and getting

the car to the garage for a tune-up. 

I admire all those who make the change from the left

hand lane...and my heart goes out to them. I left

homsexuality through psychotherapy, before it changed.

I didn't have to face a society with magazines and tv

promoting the lifestyle as something wonderful.

Althougth my mother thought it was perfectly okay and

sent me to live with three gay men when I was 17. 

I wasn't a Christian, I was a guy who asked, why am I

queer? What makes me this way? Do I have to be this

way if I don't want to? 

But now, it's cool to be gay. There are high school

clubs, college clubs and gay men and women believe in

their cause. They fight for it, they seek to make

everyone believe in it by legislating, by creating

safe havens, by marching, rallies and parades. They

create a beautiful spectacle of freedom from

conventional behavior. "Loud and Proud!" 

So to those who seek to leave, who seek to change, I

can tell you it is not easy. Yep, I still get the

occasional dream, or a thought crosses my mind and I

wonder where it came from but I'm not going to act

upon it. It disappears. But I can promise you that if

you are not a Christian, there is still help out there.

But if you are a Christian then you have a God who

loves you and will bring you wholeness, you see I

believe that those who love Christ can become whole

again, as God intended. And I also think that that Dr.

Alden was right when he said that it was easier to

help a homosexual than an alcoholic. 

So keep faith. This is not going to be an easy fight

it will be a nasty one. I spoke out the other day and

what happened afterwards was not pretty. I was

attacked because I asked a question, "What if someone

doesn't want to be gay, can they change?" at a gay tea

party at the local college. I was attacked in the

parking lot of McDonald's across the street. 
So what do we need to do? We work, we write letters,

we bring hope to one another. We have to share

and say, "I was once gay," and then explain yourself

with clarity and reason. 

We also need to support PFOX and other groups, with

time, talent and money so that they can get their

programs into schools across the country. In the end,

it will be the courage of ex-gays, the belief that God

will truly help and the support of our friends and

family that will push the issue to the forefront. But

as I said, it ain't easy baby and I have learned a lot.
But I want those of you who strugle with your feelings to 
know that I too once struggled and suffered and in time, I changed. 

God bless.

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