Saturday, June 9, 2012

Keep the Faith

 

After being straight for 29 years now, I look back and


wonder how I was ever gay. Two kids, a wife, all the


great trappings of suburban life and unlike some


peopel claim, I don't wonder what I missed. I don't


think about going to a gay bar or sex with a man. I


think about other stuff, getting leaves out of the


gutter without falling off the roof, getting enough


money to pay for my youngest son's college and getting


the car to the garage for a tune-up. 





I admire all those who make the change from the left


hand lane...and my heart goes out to them. I left


homsexuality through psychotherapy, before it changed.


I didn't have to face a society with magazines and tv


promoting the lifestyle as something wonderful.


Althougth my mother thought it was perfectly okay and


sent me to live with three gay men when I was 17. 





I wasn't a Christian, I was a guy who asked, why am I


queer? What makes me this way? Do I have to be this


way if I don't want to? 





But now, it's cool to be gay. There are high school


clubs, college clubs and gay men and women believe in


their cause. They fight for it, they seek to make


everyone believe in it by legislating, by creating


safe havens, by marching, rallies and parades. They


create a beautiful spectacle of freedom from


conventional behavior. "Loud and Proud!" 





So to those who seek to leave, who seek to change, I


can tell you it is not easy. Yep, I still get the


occasional dream, or a thought crosses my mind and I


wonder where it came from but I'm not going to act


upon it. It disappears. But I can promise you that if


you are not a Christian, there is still help out there.


But if you are a Christian then you have a God who


loves you and will bring you wholeness, you see I


believe that those who love Christ can become whole


again, as God intended. And I also think that that Dr.


Alden was right when he said that it was easier to


help a homosexual than an alcoholic. 





So keep faith. This is not going to be an easy fight


it will be a nasty one. I spoke out the other day and


what happened afterwards was not pretty. I was


attacked because I asked a question, "What if someone


doesn't want to be gay, can they change?" at a gay tea


party at the local college. I was attacked in the


parking lot of McDonald's across the street. 
 
So what do we need to do? We work, we write letters,


we bring hope to one another. We have to share


and say, "I was once gay," and then explain yourself


with clarity and reason. 



We also need to support PFOX and other groups, with


time, talent and money so that they can get their


programs into schools across the country. In the end,


it will be the courage of ex-gays, the belief that God


will truly help and the support of our friends and


family that will push the issue to the forefront. But


as I said, it ain't easy baby and I have learned a lot.
But I want those of you who strugle with your feelings to 
 
know that I too once struggled and suffered and in time, I changed. 


God bless.
 
Stuart
 
 

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