Ex-gay Sy Rogers -- Lessons Learned, Insights for redeeming the sexual generation,
volume 1, 4 diskettes. Each diskette is about 1 1/2 hours long.
Available for purchase at http://www.syrogers.com/Resources.html
Diskette 1. The power of forgiveness, how Jesus heals the broken hearted
Understandable reasons why we have unforgiveness in our hearts. Forgiving people you hate. Wounds must be mended first. Forgiveness means you owe me but I will not require you to pay me back because I am giving you mercy because that is how I similarly want to be treated.
Perception of a conflict determines our attitude. Sy discusses his relationship with his father, whom he perceived as having abandoned him as a child. He still wanted his father to pay because he blamed his father. Discusses anger issues. Child victims are not entitled to revenge or hate. Only God can judge. He asked God to forgive him for his anger against his molester. God is not fair. Justice means you get individual treatment from God. God sees what happens and our life matters to him.
Sy explains how he learned to trust God. Asked God to forgive him and he did. After you grieve, you can say goodbye to past issues. Power of forgiveness to fill the soul.
Renewing the Mind -- understanding the partnership of biology and the body Very good.
Explains gender insecurity.
Personal responsibility for our sexual feelings.
God is not ashamed of our sexuality.
Know your brain. We are biological beings, not only spiritual and moral beings. Brain patterns determine how you behave even if you are saved. You have to be responsible to address this and realize it. God does not give us a magic wand to take away bad patterns in our brain. We renew our mind by taking responsibility for how we think.
Diskette 2. Realistic expectations, what redemption does and does not do for you
Jesus takes away our guilt but not our history and our memories.
You will be flexible because God's timing is not our timing.
You must have the ability to fail, make mistakes, and start again. You are a fallen creature.
Find satisfaction in the midst of imperfection.
Perseverance means commitment to the bigger picture. Failure does not mean you erase your past progress.
Redemption does not zap away your problems nor give you amnesia of your past.
Redemption means regaining self-control. You will grow and mature. Discusses masturbation as an example.
Needs do not go away. You learn how to make them better. God's strength is brought to perfection in our weaknesses. It is God's timing and not our timing.
Gives crooked teeth as an example. Crooked teeth could be healed immediately by God, but he wants us to be healed with braces over a three-year period, to go through the ups and downs of the journey.
Diskette 3. The power of relationships
Relationships are essential for our healing.
Defines love as acceptance, Accountability And affirmation.
What works For recovery?
Your relationship with God. God's intervention in your life. Whenever I feel dirty, God makes me clean.
Your response to God. Obey God despite what you feel.
Helping others in need takes the focus off of me and my problems.
God works through counseling, confession, Support groups (which are the healing community because they share the same weakness and goals of getting better), and church life.
Disk 4. Relapse Prevention
Discusses moral failure and spiritual burnout Which are gradual and do not happen overnight, and are complex patterns. They play off of your unmet needs and desires.
Certain characteristics can lead you to disaster. Satan comes after us and tempts us to sin. You need to be loved and if you do not get it the Right Way, Satan will ensure that you get it the wrong way.
Satan can also deceive you even if you have the word and think you know the Lord. Satan deceived Adam and Eve and he can deceive you by you trying to justify your sin. If you don't keep your thoughts captive, they will keep you captive.
Compares stress fractures to an airplane accident -- stress over time which left unchecked leads to a disaster. A sudden disaster such as a moral failure is usually years in the making.
Principles of survival include the principle of dependence, I must always depend upon God because I cannot save myself. Our weaknesses keep us dependent on God. We are spiritual diabetics, we have to manage our lives by depending upon Dr. Jesus who is like our insulin.
Spiritual warfare is doing what God wants you to do even though you don't want to do it. God does not tempt us beyond our ability to resist and obey. Obedience is the antidote. I want those old things in my old sinful life, but I want God more. Ask God to cleanse your dirty thoughts every time you think of one. It is hard to keep clean in a dirty world.
The principle of submission, Bring the memories and images back under the cover of God so that they will not reign over you. Impure thoughts and memories and souvenirs of the past Should not shock you but instead bring them to the light and submit them to God. Don't be ashamed to run to God with dirty hands.
Principles of dependence, obedience and submission are your spiritual tools to avoid relapse into past sins. All of these principles create humility. The world is falling in me and around me and I do have a predator, but God can sustain me in spite of the risks.
Flee sin and escape a crash and burn accident. Repeatedly uses airplanes and airplane accidents to explain these principles. Even if you do crash and burn, get up and begin again.